“By the way, I took the liberty of fertilizing your caviar”
Your music’s bad and you should feel bad!

Once again, the conservative, sandwich-heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor!
i came to post this one.
I regularly say “Hooray, I’m helping!” to my wife.
I scuttled away with my human claws up, screeching “whoop whoop whoop” whenever my wife wanted something I didn’t like. I still wonder why she left me, Zoidberg!
The female Leela’s problem is purely medical. Soon she will drop her eggs and they will hatch and all will be well
I love the running joke that he’s a horrible human doctor
Zoidberg: There you are, good as new. Except for your dorsal fin, I’m afraid I couldn’t find it after the crash.
Fry: Can I live without it?
Zoidberg: If you call that living.
“now open your mouth and let’s have a look at that brain”
“I don’t like the looks of this doctor. I bet I’ve lost more patients than he’s cured.”
“now open your mouth and let’s have a look at that brain”
“No, not that mouth.” “I only have one.” “Really?”
Young lady, I’m an expert on human physiology.
His doctorate is in art history.
Examples of Zoidberg’s astonishingly poor grasp of human anatomy make up my favorite punchlines in the series. Of course Farnsworth would hire the worst (and possibly cheapest) candidate: a doctor that has no idea how his patients are put together.
Open your mouth. No, your other mouth.
it’s been a few years since medical school, so remind me… Disemboweling in your species… Fatal or non-fatal?
Look at me, Dr Zoidberg, Home Owner!
Oh, that’s where I left my cigar…
That just raises further questions!
That just raises more questions?!
“Once again, the conservative, sandwich heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor!”
nom-nom-nom “I’m ruined!”

Ironically, he’s never said this throughout the show’s run. The meme is attributed to him though, but it’s never said in the show.
Exactly! It may or may not be my favorite, but it is the one I constantly quote.
One of my favourite bits of trivia is that he never says this exact line, it’s a misquote, but I know in my 4 hearts that he would say it
Makes it like Star Trek with “Beam me up, Scotty.”
Hermes: Come on, baby needs a new pair of shoes!
Dr. Zoidberg: The hell with your spoiled baby! I need those shoes.

Sweet guinea pig of Winnipeg!
General: What is your purpose here?
[Zoidberg wakes up.]
Zoidberg: [drowsy] Alright, Officer, I’ll move along.
Man: What the general means is why did you come to Earth?
Zoidberg: Not a day goes by I don’t ask myself the same question.

Truman: If you come in peace, surrender or be destroyed. If you’re here to make war, we surrender.
Zoidberg: Both good. The important thing is I’m meeting new people.


Zoidberg: Hooray!

Zoidberg: Take, I’ve got four of them.

Zoidberg: The president is gagging on my gas bladder. What an honor!
Tbh Roswell that Ends Well was a goated episode from start to finish
Sawing
“Don’t cut that, I need that to speak!”
Pauses… Saws faster
“I don’t like the looks of this doctor. I bet I’ve lost more patients than he’s treated.”
I fucking love Zoidberg, he just gets me, yknow?
My first clue came at 4:15 when the clock stopped. The next clue came 3 hours later at 4:15 when I discovered the body of Amy’s dead deceased corpse
The one he never actually said: “Why not Zoidberg?”










