Yes, you’ve heard me right. I’m unemployed for a year now and getting depressed all the time with no hope on the future for me. I’m well educated but still getting offered like below minimum wage. It’s so hard to get a decent job and make something useful. I feel depressed all the time and this effects my reading ability so much. I can’t focus and go out since I’m broke. Luckily, my family didn’t kick me out yet but I feel like lost all ambition and desire to make something. I fear now, I’m gonna quit from living and be a number on a capitalism’s victim list. I’m struggling to find a reason to live nowadays.

    • bunbun@lemmygrad.ml
      5·
      12 days ago

      I’ve been doing it for four, and most of it has been pretty miserable and hopeless, just not quite enough to go visit the bridge that one last time. There were also some decent times here and there as well. And fairly recently I discovered something that I can see myself spending years on if I ever get back to a materially stable place. So I’ll keep doing the barest of minimums that I can handle until it either somehow works out for the better or kills me. That’s literally the depressed person’s trump card - “if I die - I die, oh well”.

      When you’ve been wet and cold for a long time it becomes hard to even imagine that you were ever warm and cozy in the first place. But it only takes one good evening in front of a fire to bring that back. So just keep doing what you can to find your fireplace, even if all you can do is lay down on the floor and cry. Maybe someone will hear it and come by with a portable heater c:

      • durduramayacaklar@lemmygrad.mlOP
        2·
        11 days ago

        Thanks for your words comrade. Literally, I’m living like If I die - I die because what is the other option that I can do? Work? Rejected. Friends? They abandoned me because of my political views. Family? They want to make me another cog in the machine with low paying jobs.

        I’m living with this mentality but survived somehow.

        • bunbun@lemmygrad.ml
          2·
          10 days ago

          survived somehow

          And that’s the only thing that matters. Anything else can change in the most unpredictable ways, as long as you’re around to experience it c: